| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 23 May 2007 : 21:47:05
Hi everyone,
I’m very happy to say that I’ve just had my debut novel published and would love to swap thoughts and opinions on what makes a compelling read. With this in mind, what do you think attracts a potential reader? Would it be the front cover like mine below or is it more likely to be on the strength of the synopsis? Just how important is the cover art and what really determines our decision to invest the time to actually sit down and read a book? As a new author, I feel these questions are very important, so any insights you can give will be greatly appreciated.
Link to Cover
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| 15 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 30 Jul 2008 : 18:11:53
I thought this review that was just posted on Amazon UK might be of interest. I'm really pleased with it because the reader absolutely 'got' what the novel is meant to be about.
'If ever you've strayed in a dodgy part of town you'll have felt what this novel at times conveys; a sense of anxious dread and paranoid suspicion. Evil doesn't play by the rules or rather it does but the rules are hidden. You're left constantly wondering what lurks beyond the next page and 'The Magic Lands' doesn't disappoint with twsts and turns aplenty.
Surreal, beguiling, entrancing, deflating, uplifting and even at times demanding the book reminds you of life itself and I guess that's the point. I'd recommend this for the older teenager and above or a bright younger teenager as the concepts, whilst wrapped in a context akin to a child's story, are altogether adult and belong to a world we know in real life to be decidely grey and occasionally bleak.
However there is hope - but again, as in real life, at a cost - and the reader is ultimately rewarded for the journey they take with the two boys and their companions. I'll leave you to discover what that is for yourself but if you like your novels to reach out, grab your brain and go 10 rounds instead of lying passive like the pulp they often are then I highly recommend this book to you.
'The road is cruel and dark, my friend.' '
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| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 07 Jun 2008 : 08:30:33
As a small thank you for all of the support I've had here, I thought I would post an excerpt from a work in progress, which hopefully will end up being my next book. This is only a rough version, so jump all over me, but constructive criticism is always a good thing. It's called THE SHADOW OF THE ROSE and it's another fantasy novel in a similar vein to THE MAGIC LANDS. Of course for some this may be a punishment rather than a treat! :)
He had noticed that the temperature had been gradually dropping and it was becoming quite cold, which was quite ironic as most of the children referred to this place as the hothouse, so at least Mr. Pinchbeck had done his job successfully in that regard. Encouraged by this, he resolved to wait a little while longer, speculating that perhaps the task of convincing The Headmaster to come was taking slightly longer than had been anticipated.
From the far end of the greenhouse, there was a rustling sound and Martin ducked down instinctively, his eyes and ears immediately alert.
Now that he might very well be about to come face to face with The Headmaster, the prospect intimidated him to such a degree that he broke out in a cold sweat, but then the idea surfaced in his mind that there was always the possibility that it could be someone even more undesirable creeping about in the undergrowth, and this made him even more uneasy as he waited for whoever was lurking there to show themselves.
"Martin," whispered a voice suddenly from somewhere to his left and he strained his ears, trying to recognise who it could be. "Martin, are you here? It's me, Jo!"
He stood up, scanning the vegetation and saw a figure making toward him. He realised then just how dim the light had become, the girl almost unrecognisable until she was within ten feet or so and the idea of turning on the lights briefly passed through his mind, but the surprise of seeing Jo soon made him forget about everything but why she was there.
"What are you doing here?" he said in a tone that said he was very relieved it was her.
"I didn't mean to sca...creep up on you," she said, not wanting to offend him by suggesting he was afraid. But the truth was she found it hard to believe that anyone would not be frightened waiting here alone, crowded in by masses of plant life, the place so dark she had almost tripped over making her way through the aisles to get to him. Stacks of empty crates littered the vast greenhouse and unused flowerpots were everywhere, the place surprisingly cluttered and untidy.
"It's all right," he replied with an awkward smile, "but why did you come, I mean, I'm glad you did, but what's happened? Has something gone wrong?"
Jo's grave look told him that something was indeed wrong and he moved closer to her, concerned at the distress he saw in her frightened eyes.
"There was nothing in The Headmaster's files, just blank pages," she blurted out quickly. "And Peter's hurt his leg, falling down the stairs when we were chased, or at least we think we were chased. Someone found us in the office anyway, The Headmaster I suppose and we ran, that's when Peter fell. Then we saw the note in Mr. Welles...I mean Mr. Pinchbeck's room and it said you were in danger, so I came to get you." She finished and looked at him with an odd expression that said ‘I hope that made sense’ and Martin nodded instinctively, understanding without having to be told. Jo gave him a grateful smile. "Anyway, I think we had better get out of here," she added, Mr. Welles' warning foremost in her mind.
"All right," Martin agreed, "but hold on a minute, just let me get something." Saying this, he quickly walked a few feet to his left and plucked one of the yellow flowers he had been admiring earlier and then nervously turned back to face Jo. "I thought you might like this," he said very softly, barely able to maintain eye contact.
Jo blushed but smiled with quiet pleasure. "Thank you," she murmured, wishing she could think of more to say, but she suddenly found herself tongue-tied.
As the boy stepped forward to hand her the rose, there was a clattering noise from their right and Martin stopped in his tracks, eyeing Jo with alarm. Whoever it might be, he realised immediately that they mustn't discover her here with him, as that would certainly be seen as a serious violation of the all important rules of this wretched institution. "You have to hide," he hissed urgently and glancing about in desperation his eye fell upon a large crate. "Quickly, get inside," he whispered to her, pointing at the wooden box and without really thinking Jo followed his instructions, clambering clumsily in and squatting down.
Grabbing hold of another crate, Martin stacked it on top leaving Jo in darkness with only the smallest of slits to let in what little light there was and she pushed her eye up against this gap so that she might be able to see what was going on outside.
As she watched from her uncomfortable, cramped position, a terrible scene began to play itself out before her, like some grotesque peepshow.
"So here you are, Martin, my little friend," said a voice, but Jo could only see the boy's reaction and not the speaker, but this was enough to tell her that whoever was there with him, Martin was very much afraid. "Well, aren't you going to say hello?" another voice asked good humouredly, but Jo recognised the note of sarcasm in it and she squirmed to see who was out there. Two hulking figures ambled into view to stand before the boy and Jo had to bite her lip not to let out a cry.
"I think he's nervous," Joshua Snipe said with a slow shake of his head, the grin he wore making him look very much like a Halloween pumpkin.
"Maybe he's got reason to be," returned Joseph, rubbing his hands together unpleasantly.
Martin had remained silent until now, his mind racing, trying to come up with some plausible lie about why he was there that would enable him to escape unscathed, but before he could say anything Joseph pointed at him, a wide, malicious smile commandeering his features.
"What's the flower for, nature boy?" he chuckled, "is it a peace offering!?" The two men chortled with amused laughter for a few moments and Martin decided that the only thing he could do was stick to the story Mr. Pinchbeck had originally intended for The Headmaster.
"There's something wrong with the temperature in here," he mumbled, doing his level best to sound self-assured, "Mr. Pinchbeck told me to wait here while he went to get The Headmaster."
Joseph chuckled, the sound without humour and Martin felt a chill creep up his spine. "The Headmaster!? Is that a fact?"
Martin knew he had to choose his words very carefully and hesitated before speaking again. "Everything in here will die if it isn't fixed," he said with as much confidence as he could muster. "You must have noticed how cold it is?"
Joshua was nodding at him solemnly. "Not everything," he stated, his small eyes like black marbles, and when Martin gazed into them all he could see was an utter void, as if the man had no emotions whatsoever, just an unquenchable compulsion to inflict pain and sorrow.
Martin swallowed hard and shuffled his feet uneasily. "What do you mean?"
Joseph just laughed at this, the sound echoing eerily through the greenhouse and Martin knew that his only chance of survival was to run. But before he could act upon this realisation, the Snipes moved closer to him, effectively fencing him in with no way out, as if sensing what he had in mind.
"Only you," Joshua told him with a wink, "you're the only one who's going to die."
Now Martin did try to run, regardless of the fact that he knew it was useless, his instinct for survival overriding all logical thought, but Joseph caught him roughly by his jumper and hauled him to the floor, Martin's head striking the hard ground with a horrible dull sound, the rose crushed and cast aside to lay beside his cheek.
"Chances are you're going to have a nasty headache," Joshua told him off-handedly.
"Right then, master Martin," Joseph began in a businesslike tone, "let's get down to brass tacks. We need some information and you are going to give it to us. I must warn you that we are already rather upset with you, as you have been uncommonly difficult to locate, and we do have a schedule to keep to. But now that we have you, we expect you to do the right thing and tell us what we need to know." He stared down at the boy who lay curled up at his feet, too afraid to move, Martin only distantly aware of the sensation of something thick and viscous trickling through his hair and onto his neck .
"So," continued Joshua, taking up where his brother had left off, "this is how it is. We need to know where those three newcomers are, I'm sure you know who I mean. A boy and two girls. If you help us, maybe we won't have to hurt you quite so much. If not, well, I know you understand quite well what will happen then."
Martin looked up into the faces of his persecutors, but found that instead of men, all he could see were alien creatures, their eyes wide with desire and he understood that everything was lost.
Although he tried very hard not to, he could not help but glance toward the wooden crate where Jo was hiding, wanting so much just to catch a glimpse of her one last time, but she was too well concealed and a part of him that was able to set aside the desperation and despair that gripped him with such hideous strength, took comfort from that.
"Well, boy," prompted Joseph, giving him a kick in the ribs that sent all thoughts of anything but pain fleeing from his mind. "Where are they?"
Gritting his teeth so hard that it would have hurt if it were not for the all-consuming pain in his side, Martin hissed at them. "I don't know. I haven't seen them."
Joshua stepped forward and placed a heavy boot onto the boy's outstretched hand as he reached for the battered rose, hoping to take courage from this symbol of his affection for Jo, and Martin screamed from the agony that shot up his arm as his fingers were crushed with deliberate, slow care.
The man bent down until his face was very close to the boy's and gave a merciless grin. "We know you were with those two girls. You were seen! So come on now, do yourself a favour and tell us where they are. What are they to you anyway?"
Martin's mind was beset by flashing lights, reds and yellows blinking in and out and he did his best to think of any way he might be able to escape, but however hard he tried, his brain steadfastly refused to function properly, as if it too were injured, his hand now almost numb.
"You don't have many more chances," Joseph told him with an air of impatience.
"Just tell us where they're hiding and you can go," Joshua added, affecting a congenial tone of voice. "After all, it's not you that we want, it's them. It really doesn't have to be like this, you know."
Martin closed his eyes, the anguish that he felt almost unbearable and for a moment, fleeting but nonetheless real, he asked himself why he should stay silent, but then somehow finding its way even through the weight of fear and pain, Jo's face appeared in his mind and he saw her smiling at him as he offered her the rose.
Oh Jo, why did this have to happen? Why?
"Go to hell," he whispered, tasting his own tears upon his lips.
With brutal force, Joseph brought his boot down onto Martin's arm, snapping it like a twig, the shriek it provoked reverberating from the canopy of glass above them. "You had your chance," the man grunted and knelt down, putting his full weight onto the boy's chest, several ribs collapsing almost immediately, one puncturing a lung.
Sobbing and struggling for breath, Martin attempted to wriggle free but it was useless, the man's bulk crushing him like an over-ripe piece of fruit, and as consciousness began to drift away from him, all he could think of was how this must appear to Jo, who he knew was so close and yet seemed so distant from him, as if she were no more than a dream he had once believed was real.
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| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 27 Mar 2008 : 12:48:25
For anyone interested there are a number of mini reviews of The Magic Lands on Amazon.co.uk It would be great to hear from some readers and I'm always happy to answers questions if anyone has one! |
| Naestra |
Posted - 05 Sep 2007 : 23:45:15
Hmm, in response to your first question - its the synopsis which draws me in, I find most book covers are crap or inaccurate so I dont really trust them, I tend to look for an interesting title then read the synopsis.
It also depends for me who I think is most likely to have written the synopsis (the books author or the publishers) - and with all due respect and no offence intended, I wouldn't read your book based on the synopsis if I thought it was written by you, because it was badly written and repetetive.
Your extracts were okay, it was slightly disconcerting to be plunged right into some dialogue, and a couple of repeated words/certain ways you've phrased things (you use the word 'and' too many times, I'm the kind of person who notices that kinda thing - it grates on my nerves somewhat) were irritating.
Aside that, it sounds like a really good idea you've had, and after all, it is the idea thats the most important thing. I would be interested to find out more about your story and charactors :)
xxx |
| Tasslehoff |
Posted - 05 Sep 2007 : 21:09:07
Not to be rude, but have you even read Dragonlance? You have 8 posts, and they are all in this thread. You haven't even mentioned Dragonlance. 
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| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 05 Sep 2007 : 14:01:07
Just thought I would post a character breakdown from my book for anyone who is interested. As always feedback would be appreciated
Tom Lewis.
Jack Barton.
Two boys about to embark on a journey that will take them toward adulthood, a change embracing both enlightenment and loss. Two boys who will discover a place apart from the world we know, a realm where dreams and reality seem to interweave and deception is at the heart of everything.
Mo.
To the boys he is a badger, an animal. But one capable of speech, capable of far more than they suspect. To Tom and Jack he is a mentor, a guide, but as their journey unfolds, they will discover that he holds the key to many mysteries and keeps hidden from them many secrets.
The White Wolf.
A beast, a cruel adversary. But one with a purpose. One who delights in the darkness. One who enjoys the deadliest of games where life and death are but the smallest of wagers.
Dredger.
A warrior from the past, held in limbo for so long his mind may well have become unhinged. A man who holds duty above all things, but who carries a darkness within his soul that may be not only his own undoing, but also bring down those who he has sworn to protect.
Lisa.
The girl of Tom’s dreams. Or his nightmares. Enigmatic, innocent and yet sensual. A mystery.
Ira.
An old man who has travelled further than can be possibly imagined. A man who must send his only son on a quest that may very well lead to death, or perhaps things far worse than death.
Geheimnis.
A man who wears a mask. An enemy or an ally? A dangerous man, if indeed a man he is.
A disparate band brought together to find a solution to a question asked at the dawn of time. To find a reason for both the darkness and the light. To find hope. But also to pay the price.
I have posted two short excerpts from THE MAGIC LANDS at this link: http://hometown.aol.co.uk/markjohnhockley/myhomepage/mywork.html |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 18 Jul 2007 : 08:51:48
Just to let anyone know who may be interested that I've added another excerpt from my book The Magic Lands at this link: http://hometown.aol.co.uk/markjohnhockley/myhomepage/mywork.html
As always, feedback would be very much appreciated :) |
| Loki of the Lance |
Posted - 25 Jun 2007 : 18:53:39
i am sorry to say that i take to judging a book by its cover unless someone has refered it to me or i have been reading the previous books in the series.
Est Sularas est Mithos |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 15 Jun 2007 : 20:27:09
Hi Shade :)
Thanks for all of that excellent info. Very much appreciated! |
| Shade0837 |
Posted - 15 Jun 2007 : 18:09:20
Speaking as someone who reads ALOT and worked in a Bookstore (and now a Library). This has been my personal experience (take it for what it is worth, my opinion as to how things work)
First "Your Last Name" will determine where your book is and how much shelf space you have to work with. (ex: if your name is in the R-Z range you are in the crowd and will not get much room to set your book apart from everyone else's. Yes there are not a lot of writers with the last name U - Z but all their space is taken up by the S and T names). Important yes but really not much you can do about it. The fewer last names in your part of the alphabet the better chance you will get a facing.
Second "Catchy and Fitting Cover Art", Yes it maybe hard to find a work of art that is both, if you are not having it commissioned. But good art work will get you a "Facing" (having your book set so people can see the cover art) if the Stocker Clerk likes your art, even over bigger names. Fitting Cover art will not give your readers any cause for complaint, I can not tell you the number of times people would tell me the picture has nothing to do with the story (a few even asked about false advertising laws). Best of all "Cover Art" attracts readers who are just "Walking By" the section with your book in it.
Third "Title" like what was said before from the Spine it needs to be able to grab attention (Yes it is a tough sell, some people swear by Flashy lettering or bright colors), but personally I think it has to be the Wording. This more than anything else will get the book into peoples hands (librarys and many bookstores auto-spine new authors so it is the Title that you need to prefect). This gets you people who are looking for a book in your section, they will go shelf by shelf looking for a title to catch their eye.
Last "The Synopsis" At this point the book is almost theirs, customers are 50% more likely to buy a book that they have in their hands (I am fairly sure it is much higher than that). The Customer liked the title and cover art, which if both are fitting that means they where looking for a book like yours. Your Synopsis should emphasize the connection between the cover art and the title while giving a brief plot and/or setting the stage for the book.
I have know people who buy book because of the "Bio", Reviews, or Endorsements.
Anyway I am going to start looking for your book.
Good Luck with it
It has been said that the one most susceptible to an illusion is often the one who has cast it, for he of all people MUST believe in its worth" |
| james |
Posted - 13 Jun 2007 : 23:17:48
glad to help. Its not everyday I get to share my opinons with an author. Got a thing or two I'd like to tell M.W. about some recent books. |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 13 Jun 2007 : 22:40:49
Hi James,
Glad you found it intriguing. It's tough deciding what to post as a kind of teaser and I guess, as you say, coming in somewhere part way through the story can be a bit confusing. But I'm pleased you want to find out more :) And if you decide to read the whole book I would be extremely interested to hear your opinion on it. |
| james |
Posted - 13 Jun 2007 : 16:37:48
I was a little put off by going pretty much straight into dialogue. I don't know the characters yet, so I'm not particularly interested in what the have to say. But when they entered the room, it got my attention. I want to know who this wolf is, why the door can disapear, and who the heck is Mo and why would he be tied up?
All in all it reads very similar to the synopsis. Which is a god thing in my opinon. I love being able to judge a book by its cover. |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 13 Jun 2007 : 09:10:34
Hi,
Just thought I'd let you know that I've posted an extract from my book here: http://hometown.aol.co.uk/markjohnhockley/myhomepage/mywork.html
If anyone gets a chance to read it I would be grateful for some feedback.
Thanks :) |
| MarkJohnH |
Posted - 24 May 2007 : 18:55:16
Hi,
Thanks for your comments on the synopsis. You're quite right about the way the synopsis reads. My intention was to write a novel that has the conventions of a children's story (Narnia etc.) but gradually becomes something more psychologically challenging with a spiritual dimension. Whether I've succeeded will be decided by those who read it, so I hope you may get a chance to tell me what you think :)
Also, you could always order it from your library if you can't find it in your local bookshop!
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